The basis of our talk today about betrothing in Islam. The engagement phase is one component that has a delicate part of performing in married life. If this period is handled gracefully and its specific responsibilities are fulfilled, it may profoundly impact following times of growth, fruitfulness, and solidarity.
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Betrothing in Islam
What is the meaning of betrothal in Islam, and how important is it for marital success?
All praise is due to Allah, the Universe’s Creator. I certify that none is deserving of worship save Allah and that Muhammad, Sallallahu ‘Alayhi wa Sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
The term “betrothal” or “proposal” refers to the act of requesting a lady or her guardian for her hand in marriage.
Its significance stems from the fact that it is the first step toward marriage, as marriage cannot take place without the consent and agreement of both parties, which is achieved by betrothal.
There are no specific rites associated with betrothal. The suitor or his representative only needs to make a proposal to the woman’s guardian and ask him to marry her to him.
The betrothal is consummated when both the guardian and the woman agree.
Allah is the most knowledgeable.
The Importance of betrothing in Islam
There must be a separation between the contract and the marriage in certain respects. This is what is called betrothing in Islam, but why?
The first Benefit
A girl who has lived in a family with her family members for a long time, particularly her father and mother, has a deep and strong attachment to them. Separating from them is extremely difficult for her.
As a result, abruptly separating her from her family would be detrimental to her emotional well-being.
Instead, it is vital to prepare her to confront the separation gradually.
The second Benefit of betrothing in Islam
Because the boy and girl whose life obligations have been on the shoulders of their parents up to this point do not have the preparation to carry them all at once, a gap is essential to allow them to prepare themselves to shoulder the weight of joint life responsibilities.
In this regard, the manner of life of birds is beautiful and founded on knowledge.
The mother bird spends a long time teaching her chicks to fly and live independently.
She prepares them to organize their own lives and will not let them leave her until they are ready.
The third Benefit
It is challenging for a guy and girl who were strangers only a short time ago to adjust to one other without any preparatory phases and begin an independent existence suddenly.
To be ready for their future life together, they must become acquainted and form affection.
The fourth Benefit
It is conceivable that the girl and the boy are not ready to establish a joint and independent existence for continuing education or military training but are prepared to get engaged.
As a result, they get engaged and stay so until the obstacles and constraints are lifted, and they may marry.
The fifth Benefit of betrothing in Islam
Both the girl’s and the boy’s parents must prepare for the marriage of their children.
The length of the engagement gives them the time they need to prepare.
The Girl and Boy’s Duties During betrothing in Islam
In addition to the needs and advantages indicated in the preceding debate, namely the requirement for the engagement period’ previously described, the engagement period has its own set of perks, and the boy and the girl have some responsibilities to fulfill, as follows:
Improving Mutual Recognization and Understanding
Although the boy and the girl, while betrothing in Islam, should have developed adequate mutual recognition during the selection process, they must also establish a much deeper and intimate recognition, with a greater understanding of one another’s souls, morality, and perspectives.
In reality, the familiarity and recognition gained throughout the engagement stage satisfy the credit earned during the selection phase.
Following that, they prepare for comprehension and homogeneity in their shared existence due to this intimate and thorough acknowledgment.
This is for comprehension and harmony, and that recognition was designed for choosing.
The growth of hope for one’s future life
Hope has an essential part in the well-being of ordinary people.
Fiancés should not neglect to instill optimism in each other’s hearts through positive words, sobriety, and confidence in their actions.
Laying the Groundwork for Future Independence
In most cases, the boy and girl are tied to and aligned with their parents’ lives; this alignment should evolve towards independence.
Betrothing in Islam is an excellent opportunity to establish the groundwork for this independence.
Fiancés should plan their future together, defining their goals and aspirations and the paths to achieve them.
Affirmation of Love
According to the topic “love, the pivot of life,” love is one of the faithful and accurate requirements of marital prosperity, and its foundation should be leveled before marriage.
Nonetheless, the duration of the engagement is the finest chance and opportunity for love to develop, improve, consolidate, and strengthen.
The fiancés’ behavior, discussion, and other activities can increase or decrease love.
As a result, both males and girls must be extremely cautious and aware of their actions.
They must also make every effort to enhance love while avoiding love-depleting actions.
Presenting a Gift
Presents have an unusual significance in appealing to hearts and developing and boosting love; the fiancés must not overlook this lovely and significant element.
The presents are not required to be precious, but it is crucial that they correspond to the other party’s preferences.
More importantly, it is presented attractively and tastefully.
Giving a present necessitates a certain level of elegance and sophistication.
It is important to remember that a gift should not be presented in a one-sided manner.
This isn’t to say that only boys offer gifts.
Of course, he could show more than just the girl.
In the context of our talk, which was about betrothing in Islam, we have to look at an important matter, which is:
As the proverb goes, a single day of engagement is preferable to a year of the post-marriage phase.
Although this is an exaggeration, it accurately represents a significant fact: the engagement phase is, in many ways, more essential, sweeter, pleasurable, and character-building than the post-marriage period.
The pillars and foundations of future life can be established during this time.